THINGS A HAMSTER THINKS
AS HE IS BEING DEVOURED BY A SNAKE
10. Snakes look much the same on the inside as they do on the outside.
9. I wonder what I taste like?
8. That's odd. Wikipedia said this type of snake was an herbivore.
7. This is sooo punk rock.
6. I totally forgot to return Glenn's "Freaks & Geeks" DVD.
5. It's true: In the end, it really doesn't matter who you vote for.
4. "And when he shall die, take him and cut him out in little stars, and he will make the face of Heaven so fine that all the world will be in love with night and pay no worship to the garish sun."
3. I really regret those seven years I wasted in art school.
2. The pet shop clerk clearly stated that I was not to be used as food.
1. This is taking a lot longer than I had hoped.