CAPTIONS FOR NEW YORKER CARTOONS THAT HAVE YET TO BE DRAWN: A FREE SERVICE

01. "That's the last time I ever open my mouth in a meeting."
02. "When I said 'Sell everything,' I didn't mean everything."
03. "But honey, Obama said the country needs to become more unified."
04. "I'm resigning to spend more time with my Second Life family."
05. "He's not a guide dog, per se, but he does know a lot about art."